Merry Christmas – 2014
January 11, 2015
I admit I totally love the Christmas holiday season. Yeah, I love the near-mystical side of it with the songs, the snow, the decorations. The anticipation of family getting together, the unexpected kindness and charity seen among strangers. I also love the traditional side of it wth the baby Jesus in a manger scene with shepherds, angels, beautiful choirs singing the great carols of the season.
Also, I enjoy the mythical side of it with children sitting on Santa’s lap with their wish list, the elves, the sleigh being led by Rudolph and his red nose and watching “A Charlie Brown Christmas” special. Followed by “It’s a Wonderful Life”. Additionally, I truly enjoy the commercial side of Christmas with Black Friday sales and the crowded malls. The decorations of the stores, finding a good bargain and seeing the delight on the face of those who receive it. It’s a very complete package of emotions.
Yes, I enjoy it all. Sometimes, however, I wonder if I have actually learned anything of real substance. Other than celebrating the tradition and having a feel-good emotional experience. Traditions that fail to teach deeper truth can lose their validity. Once that occurs it is only the passing of time before the tradition is a shell. Hollowed out with nothing of substance.
I have a very dear friend in business whose family is Jewish, but not in any meaningful way, as he states it. The only 2 traditions he follows is Yom Kippur in October when he goes to the synagogue and the weekly Sabbath eve meal on Friday nights. I have frequently asked him why he honors those. His answer is, “I don’t know, we just did it in my family growing up and we just do it”. When asked what if any significance he assigns to those traditions, he again responds with, “None. We just do them because they are traditions”.
Perhaps there is merit in traditions for traditions sake, but I want my Christmas traditions to have more than that. I want to leave this world having left my children a heritage of more than, “I don’t know; we just always did it that way”. I’m reminded of a story of a newlywed couple celebrating their first Christmas. The young bride fixed a ham after her family’s tradition. She began by cutting off one-third of the ham and putting it away in the refrigerator.
The husband asked why she would do that. She said, “Because my mother did that”. Year after year, the wife performed the same ritual of lopping off a third of the ham and only cooking 2/3 of it. After many years, the couple visited her family for the holiday and sure enough, the mother of the bride performed the same ritual. The young husband asked his mother-in-law why she did that and her response was the same as his wife’s, “My mother always did that when I was a little girl”. Well, it happened that the grandmother was also at the house for Christmas so the young husband asked her to come into the kitchen and he asked her why SHE had cut the third part of the ham off before cooking it.
“Well”, she began. “When I was a young bride, I didn’t have many cooking pans and the only one I had to cook a ham in was not large enough to hold the ham”. “So I cut off a piece to make it fit the pan”. Thus, the mystery of the missing ham was solved. Yet, the daughter and granddaughter had continued a tradition based on necessity rather than any continued substantive reason. That would be much like our continuing to have our babies in barns and caves during the Christmas season rather than hospitals or more sterile environments only because Mary bore Jesus in a manger. The “tradition” would miss the story and the purpose.
So, what have I learned after celebrating a 32 Christmases? Let me give you just three simple ones for this year.
First, I have learned that if Christmas is about giving and receiving, I can have Christmas anytime of the year I want. I can have Christmas literally 365 days a year. Make no mistake, Christmas IS about giving and receiving. There would be no Christ-mas without the birth of Christ and his birth was the profound expression of the love of God. “For God so loved the world that HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON”. Yes, the first Christmas was about giving, and every Christmas since has been the celebration of that gift. Many may choose to ignore that fact or refuse to receive that gift, but that’s the whole essence of Christmas.
Learning to both give and receive is part of growing up. I’ve been to many Christmas parties and have witnessed the awkwardness of adults in doing both. Griping because they have to give or unable to receive a gift graciously and gratefully. Too many children and adults alike show their disappointment, their disgust, their contempt and their rejection. Learning to receive and give with contentment, with grace and with a humble spirit. To show the giver your appreciation from the heart. Well, that’s also a large part of the Christmas spirit.
Secondly, Christmas is rediscovering the priority of family and true friends. The original Christmas was a humble occasion of a birth in a barn or a cave used as a barn. The attendees were possibly the immediate family of Joseph and Mary and then the company of Shepherds who understood the momentous occasion was the birth of the Messiah. Christmas reminds us that in our desperate moments, we discover who are true friends and family are. Many abandon us or ignore us as the innkeeper did who had no room for the couple. I wonder if that innkeeper ever discovered that he rejected the Messiah that night. And when we go through our tough moments alone, it is only those who can look beyond the present circumstances and see the greatness of the humble people who come to encourage them.
In our own lives, there are few who seem to truly want to know us or be with us. Those true friends and loved ones who stand with us in our deepest darkest times – there is no price that can be set on that. They are truly priceless and rare. Christmas is the celebration of that kind of love and friendship.
Finally, I’m learning that Christmas is about a very important matter: Learning to forgive is more important than proving that you’re right. Christ coming into this world was proof of that. God is right. But He decided that being right and alone was not as important as forgiving the wrongs and building a relationship with man. Our world is filled with strife today. Ferguson, MO; NYC, NY; Syria; Kurdistan; Iraq; Pakistan; Ukraine – just about every page of the papers and every news show has much to report on strife – strife among people who want to prove their point of view is the only right one. Religious, racial, political. All want to prove that they are the ones who have it right.
Few are willing to forgive; to look at this world and realize that much strife cannot be anything more than one person, one group, one race, one nation, one religion insisting that they alone see it correctly. The ONLY Person Who can truly say that is God. And His response was to send His Son to die for our sins and to be raised from the dead, thus opening up the way for forgiveness and relationship. We need more relationship builders and fewer destroyers. We need more peacemakers and fewer warmongers. More righteous people who are willing to work at forgiving rather than condemning.
Well, those are my reflections as I stare at a beautifully decorated tree, hearing the soft sounds of Kenny G play “I’ll be Home for Christmas” and drink my hot chocolate and think of my many many friends reading this. Merry Christmas to you and yours. May the true peace and joy of Christmas flood your life and home this season.
